Finding Hope (Satan's Sinners MC Book 7) Read online

  I look down and see the blood soaking through the grey sweatpants they put on me. "I will. I'll call them when I'm with my cousin. She's coming to get me now." I have no way to clean myself up, which comes with an overwhelming feeling of embarrassment. "I'm sorry."

  "Don't be sorry." The man sits quietly with me until Lindy bursts through the door.

  “T.” She gasps and covers her mouth as her own tears begin to fall at the sight of me.

  Tears trickle down my cheeks. “Just help me into the car. Please.”

  After they get me into the passenger seat, the man, whose name I never got, hangs his head as he walks back into the restaurant. Lindy slides into the driver's seat, her knuckles begin to turn white from how hard she's clenching the wheel. "I'm taking you to a safe place, T. You have to trust me." Her eyes stare out the windshield, but I get a sense she is battling a war within herself.

  "I need to find my baby! They said she was stillborn, but I swear I heard her cry. Lindy, I don't know what the hell happened. I don't know what's true and what's not. They had me so drugged up, and then they left me in that alley. We need to call the cops!" I sit up further and my pulse races with fear.

  Her gaze snaps to mine. "No, we need the Satan's Sinners. They’ll protect you, but I need you to tell me everything you remember."

  As our trip begins, I let it all out. I confide everything that happened during my relationship with Richie, however, the further away we get from Arizona, something within me begins to change. A need for vengeance burns and retribution rages within me. A need to make them all pay sits heavily inside me, but it’ll be from me, not the Satan’s Sinners. I make Lindy promise she will keep quiet until I’m ready to talk.

  I lie here with my arms behind my head and my ankles crossed as I stare at the ceiling from my top bunk. I've been in this place for the last four years, but I'm turning eighteen in a couple of days, and I have nowhere to go. The court system is so fucked. They want to lock up minors, but once they’re eighteen, they throw them out on the street and don’t give two shits about where they end up. They figure we’ll all end up dead or in prison anyway.

  "You awake?" Potter's voice is quiet from the next bunk over.

  "Yeah." My attention drags over to him.

  "You're outta here in a couple of days," My friend says the same thing I was thinking. "Where are you gonna go?" I don’t know what all he’s been through, but the sixteen-year-old has been my sole friend in this place.

  Shrugging my shoulder, even though he can't see it in the dark, I respond, "Guess I'll be on the streets. I don't have anywhere to go. It's all I can do until I get a job and a place of my own."

  "When I get outta here, I'm going to the Satan's Sinners." His attention drifts off like he's dreaming of a faraway place.

  My brows pull down tight. “The motorcycle club?”

  "Yep, no one fucks with them, not even the cops."

  "How you know they'll take you?"

  "I don't, but before I came here, I overheard my dad talking to some of his buddies because he hangs out with them. I guess they do whatever the hell they want. They have drugs, it's a party every night, and more pussy than we've ever seen." He quietly laughs. He makes it seem like it's a dream come true. "My dad said you have to prospect for them, and after so long, you become a member. He's been trying to prospect for a while now."

  I have no idea what the hell he's going on about. “Prospecting?”

  "Yeah, you're basically their little bitch boy until they think you're worthy to wear the patch. You do all their dirty work, and when they say jump, you better say how motherfucking high."

  I shake my head at the stupidity of it. “Why the fuck would you wanna do that?”

  He sighs and turns over to face me. "Because you gain the ultimate respect, you gain a family, a brotherhood. They'll have your back, and you have theirs. You will be feared by everyone outside of the biker world." His eyes cut to mine in the dark. "I want that fear."

  "Well, good luck with that." I chuckle. "I'm going to sleep." I roll over on my bunk and face the opposite way until my eyes finally begin to close, but it's a restless sleep when the dreams come.

  I've turned my television up, trying to drown out the yelling, but it's done no good. My parents are fighting once again, just like they always do. I’m so tired of all the screaming and yelling. I wish he’d just go the hell away and stay away from me and mom.

  I sigh heavily and grab the gun I got from a friend at school. No way would I use it, but maybe I can scare my dad enough that he'll leave this time–for good. Quietly, I open my bedroom door and take slow steps down the hall until I reach the entrance to the living room. My mom shoves my dad, but he towers over her, it doesn't even faze him. His dark-skinned fist rears back before plowing forward and connecting against my mom's cream-colored cheek. She cries out in pain, and when she sees the blood, she tries to attack him. Her arms flail as she tries to punch and scratch any part of his body she can.

  My father pushes her down, but she comes back for more. She keeps coming back, but this time he grabs the heavy rock ashtray that sits in the middle of our glass coffee table. The cigarette butts fall to the blue carpet, and ashes fly around in the air. He lifts it over his head.

  I scream. "No!" Elongating the word, but it doesn't stop him. He brings the ashtray down on her head over and over, crushing her skull.

  My mother lays there lifeless, and tears stream down my cheeks. I lift the gun, and without even thinking, I shoot with my eyes closed. The loud bang–one, two, three times–deafens me as I open my eyes back up to see my father's body crash into the coffee table. I cover my eyes with my arm, protecting them from the shattering of glass, but I run to my mother and pull her tiny body into my lap as I scream for her to wake up. "I told you to leave him!" I cry while I rock back and forth. "Why didn't you listen?" I hold her close to my chest as the sobs rack through my body.

  The sounds of sirens are blaring outside, and everything happens so fast as the cops charge into our trailer. They see the scene before them and handcuff me anyway. By my fourteenth birthday, I was officially charged with manslaughter.

  Yelling wakes me from my bunk, and when I sit up, I see Potter and another inmate throwing punches at each other. I hop down to see what’s going on and realize it’s the inmate Potter had problems with earlier this week. When I join in the circle, Potter goes down to the ground with a shank sticking out of his neck.

  I push people out of the way and drop to my knees beside him. “Potter?” He doesn’t respond. Blood is everywhere, but I don’t give a shit, I pull my friend into my lap and hold him just like I did my mom. “Help!” I scream as everyone just stands above us, gawking at Potter’s dead body. “Guards!” A tear trails down my cheek. “Someone go get the guards!” I scream at the onlookers until finally, the circle breaks apart. “I’ll go to the Satan’s Sinners for you,” I tell Potter before the guards rip me away from him.

  Lying with Giovanna is one of my favorite places to be. Especially with her naked body pressed against mine, and my fingers running through her long dark hair. "I should go." I sigh with hesitation because I don’t want to leave her or this bed.

  "No." She gazes up at me with her bottom lip stuck out in a pout. "I want to show you something." She lifts herself off of me and stands from the bed to begin getting dressed.

  "Okay." I grin and add, "but then I really do have to go. The club is waiting for me."

  She rolls her eyes. "The club. It's always the club."

  My brows pull down. "What's with you? You know I'm trying to get my patch."

  She puts her hands on her hips. "My deal is, they don't like me because of my family. How can we expect this to ever work?"

  Stepping over to her, I run my hands up and down her arms. "Hey, it'll work out. Once this job is done, we won't have anything to worry about."

  We both get our clothes on, and she takes my hand in hers. "Once it's done, we won't have anything to worry about," She repea
ts in an ominous way.

  She takes the lead down the stairs and into the closed restaurant her family owns. "What did you want to show me?"

  She looks over her shoulder as her dark eyes shine, and she grins at me. "It's just this way." She opens another door that leads to the basement. "Right down those stairs."

  I chuckle. "Gi, you're being fucking weird. What's going on?"

  Something hits my back, and I tumble down the stairs. "Ah, fuck! Gi?" I call from the bottom of the staircase.

  "You thought you and your club could come in here and take my family out?" Her tone turns angry as she takes each step down, followed by her uncle. Nothing I've ever heard from her before.

  "You played me?" I breathe through the pain in my body. My chest tightens with betrayal; my brothers were right about her.

  She spits at me, "Oh, come on, like you didn't play me? You think I would really fall in love with a man trying to kill my family?"

  "Get up." Her uncle grabs me with one arm while his other hand holds a gun pointed at me. Giovanna opens the door, and I'm thrown into a room with nothing except a chair. He pushes me into it as she begins to tie me to the chair. His gun whips across my cheek; the sting is brutal, and a trickle of blood begins running down my cheek. "We'll see how long it takes for your men to come looking for you, and when they do, we will take them out. The Gremaldi family will rise as this city's esteem for taking out the infamous Satan's Sinners.” His other fist connects with my eye. "Let's leave him for now," Her uncle orders. As the door slams shut, I wonder how the fuck I’m going to get out of this. They might as well kill me because if they don't, my brothers will.

  I stand here in front of all of these people with their smiling faces; however, they don't know my smile is fake. I stand beside my cousin, Lindy–or Chatty, the name these people call her–and am trying to be ecstatic for her today as she marries Gunner. It's one of the happiest days of her life, and to an extent, I am happy for her…as happy as I can be. Gunner stands proudly–with the help of his crutches–before all of their family and friends, confessing his love for my cousin, and I’m attempting to stay focused on their big moment, but it all drifts away.

  These people think I'm just Chatty's quiet cousin, but they don't know me, they don't know the demons I carry, and they don't know the hell I've been through. At one time, my life was jubilant, it was perfect. I was getting married, and I was going to have a baby, but it was all lies. I kept the ring and have it stored safely to remind me. I still wear the button up white shirt and grey sweatpants they dressed me in before dumping my body in a back alley as well.

  Two years.

  Two long years, I've been here, trying to piece my life back together. Two years that I've felt nothing except an emptiness. Two years that I've been searching every chance I get. I sit in my room and don't socialize; these people think it's because I'm scared of them, they think I'm depressed. I'm not fucking depressed, I'm angry as hell. That need for vengeance and retribution has only burned hotter and hotter within me during the time I’ve been away from Arizona. I get along with the ladies, and I put on a good show of being who they think I am, however, if they only knew what I really did when they aren’t looking.

  Two years that I've had to form a plan, and two years that I've gone into the club’s various businesses, doing their books–except for Stilettos because Demon refuses to give it up. For two years, I've used their computers to secretly search for information, search for names. And the time has finally come for me to go back to the place I used to call home.

  "T, you coming?" Chatty's enthusiastic tone draws me out of my thoughts. She’s gone on like nothing happened, just like I asked her to. She’s held my secrets, even when Richie texted me on the new phone I bought. Chatty doesn’t know that I’m the one who messaged him first. I was ready to return at that time to try and find my daughter, but it wasn’t time yet.

  Then he showed up here to take me back. Why did he show up? Because I had to use what I could and make him believe that I understood why he did what he did, but the Satan’s Sinners wanted to protect me. They ran him off. What they don’t realize is I don’t need protection. The people who took my baby need protection from me. I’m coming for each and every one of them…Richie included.

  Putting on another fake smile, I reply, "Sorry. I zoned out for a minute." I stride down the aisle and head over to the reception area where the DJ is getting the music ready.

  "You, okay?" Chatty asks, trekking up beside me while Gunner joins some of his brothers for a drink.

  "Yeah, I’m fine. I promise." My eyes meet hers, and I reach out to hug her. "I'm so happy for you." I try to sound as genuine as possible. Maybe I’m a little jealous because Chatty has her daughter and is now re-married. It should have been me.

  "Thank you. Maybe it’s time you told them?" She whispers in my ear, but before I get a chance to respond, the other ladies join us: Zoey, Jacey, Ever, Sierra, and Audrey. Looking around, I see Daphne and Doc leaving.

  "We're so happy for you and Gunner!" Zoey exclaims, and the others agree, each giving her their own congratulations.

  "You look beautiful!" Sierra gushes over Chatty's simple yet gorgeous dress. Usually, women want the long flowing gowns, but not Chatty. Hers doesn't even touch her knees.

  "I can't believe how great Gunner is doing. He's worked so hard to get where he is, and for him to stand next to you, is amazing." Jacey’s excitement is palpable. I think the old doctor side still comes out of her every once in a while.

  "I know! I didn't even know he was making that much progress at therapy. Spike has really helped him." Chatty's dazzling smile shines with pride for her new husband.

  Hacker joins our group, but not for long because he pulls Sierra out to dance with him. The others soon follow as Hanger takes Zoey, Bear gets Jacey, Hunter grabs Audrey, and Writer tugs Ever away. Gunner stands with his crutches in the middle of the dance floor. Chatty smiles brightly, and you can clearly see the love they have for each other. She quickly makes her way to him as they begin their first dance as husband and wife.

  Standing here awkwardly by myself, I think about going back to my room. "You wanna dance?" His voice is as smooth as a shot of Jamison. His skin is the color of caramel with eyes the shade of mocha. I’ve dreamed of him more than I should. My dirty thoughts revolve around him. I’ve wondered too many times what it would be like to have his dark-toned flesh against the contrast of my creamy white body.

  Spinning around to face him, I ask with narrowed eyes, "Why would I wanna dance with you?"

  His sexy as sin smirk appears, showing his straight white teeth. His tongue runs across his bottom lip. "'Cause you know it's awkward as hell standing here by yourself, and I see those wheels turning in that head of yours. You wanna run back to your room and have that door between you and reality."

  I stare into his chocolate eyes and try to hide how much I really do want to dance with him. "You think you know me, but you don't."

  Reaching out, he takes my wrist and pulls me behind him. He twirls me around on the dancefloor before tugging me quickly into his hard chest. His finger touches my chin, bringing my gaze to his. "I've watched you enough to know you." He shrugs nonchalantly. "I've had enough experience with women to have a good grasp of them."

  My lips purse, and I nod. "They don't call you Romeo for nothing." He thinks he knows, but he has no idea the baggage I carry.

  He agrees and repeats my words, "They don't call me Romeo for nothing." Following his lead, we sway to the rhythm of the music.

  "I'm still mad at you for when we first met." I don't even know why I'm bringing that up. Maybe because when I'm in Romeo's vicinity, my mind fills with thoughts I shouldn't be having. I need a clear head, and it strays because of him. Or maybe it’s because I like being this close to him. I like it a lot, and way more than I should, which is why I’m deflecting.

  He chuckles, and even that's a sexy sound. "C'mon, Tin, when are you gonna get over the fact it was a mistak
e? What did you expect when you were leaning over and looking in the icebox? When I walked in, I only saw a nice round ass. I'm sorry for the millionth time for thinking you were a club whore." He grins down at me and adds, "Can a guy get a break around here?"

  "Nope." My lips turn up in a small smirk. "I'll make you regret it for the rest of your days." A raindrop hits my forehead. "Ah, it's about to rain." I wipe the wet spot with my fingers just as the DJ announces that everyone needs to move into the clubhouse.

  "You head on inside." He releases me, and I watch his tight sculpted ass walk away. Shaking the dirty thoughts from my head, I race for the door, but everyone’s piled at the entrance, trying to get inside and escape the now pouring rain.

  Chatty and Gunner sit behind a table with their wedding cake in front of them. The five-tier cake with red roses is beautiful. On top, sits a couple on a motorcycle, and it's perfect for them. Gunner gently lets Chatty bite her piece, however, on her turn, she smashes it in his face. Everyone roars with laughter until suddenly, Romeo and Drifter fly out of the hallway.

  Romeo yells over the crowd, "Get out! Everyone, get out!"

  Her hazel eyes stare into mine as we dance, and I finally have her close to me. I count every gold fleck that shines in her beautiful orbs. I notice every single detail about Tinsley, and I still find something new about her every single time I'm near her. She's fucking dangerous, and I swear to Christ, she knows it. I try to stay the fuck away from her, but I'm drawn back with a simple look. I didn't ask her to dance because she was standing there alone, I asked her dance to have a reason to touch her, to have her body against mine. I'm trying so fucking hard to keep my distance since she is Chatty's cousin, but also because the last woman I loved, set me up.

  Giovanna Gremaldi was a cunt that made me fall for her. I loved that bitch so fucking much, only to find out she lied about everything. She only got close to me because of her family, and she was going to let them kill me. Her family wanted to destroy my club, and they would have succeeded. But thank fuck for Hanger's ol' lady! She blew Giovanna's brains out when they found me being held hostage. They would have never located me if Pretty Boy hadn’t turned on his family. Now the prospect is with us, and his family is no more.